When your biggest challenge as a Realtor has been the OTHER Realtor...

The Realtor on the other side of the transaction has been incredibly difficult.

You name it; they have challenged you with it.

From the inspection report demands to surprising you with the “one more thing or we do not have a deal” threat…

You have been taken through the mud by this person.

You have tried to be reasonable.

You have done everything you can to meet them halfway.

And here you are, nearing the end of the transaction and they have thrown yet another curve-ball.

If this has happened to you then you have at some point ask yourself:  “what is going to make this broker back off?!”

Try this:

Stop being predictable.

These agents are banking on handling you the same way they have handled every other broker before you.

They anticipate how you will negotiate/react...
And after years of practice they have learned that staying in attack mode works.

Every time you respond to their demands in a way they expect... you are further reinforcing their tactics are working. 

The scenario:  The agent that represents the buyers of your sellers continues to ask for your clients to give more to the deal.  You are at the point where your clients are frustrated enough to walk.  Prior to these particular buyers, you were in a multiple offer situation and the other buyers are becoming options to reconsider according to your sellers.  Your clients either want to close as is, find a new buyer, or potentially even take their home off the market. They have had enough. 

4 step Solution Plan:

1.See the situation clearly:Throughout this process keep in mind that this agent can attempt to push you around but ultimately you know they need the deal to close.  Sometimes we can get so frazzled by a person they can convince us "if you don’t do what I say then we will walk."  Do not be fooled by your nerves.  This agent wants a closing as much as everyone else in the deal and their clients will not be pleased if the deal collapses.   

 2. Understand that if you are at your wits end, Agent Dread(the other Realtor) can hear it in your voice. 

This is one of the things Agent Dread uses to know that they are still in control.  If you sound nervous she(*just picking she)  will know.  If you sound annoyed… she will know.  It doesn’t matter which of the two emotions your voice indicates, either one lets her know that she still has control. 

Solution: Keep your voice low and do not use inflection.  Keep yourself sounding at peace.  Try not to speed up or slow down when you are the one talking no matter what she throws at you.  You want her to think you are calm and the best way to convince her is to actually be calm.  Talking slowly projects you are in a calm state.

3. If Agent Dread has been in attack mode the entire transaction, today will not be different.  Start the conversation by telling them that you apologize.  Literally say “I apologize”…

This may sound risky and you may feel like it makes you look vulnerable but the psychology behind it is just the opposite!  When you start off a conversation with “I apologize” It will through Agent Dread off of her guard.  Think about when two people fight and someone finally says they are sorry.  Those words disarm people and she will not be expecting you to apologize.  Remember, she knows she has pushed you.  If anything she is expecting that you will finally snap. So when you don’t, you will get her attention because she is used to being able to predict people.  She is used to taking power from other agents so when you freely give her power she will not be as confrontational.  This is a good example on how you can shift power to your advantage without “taking” it by simply confusing Agent Dread with your approach.

4.  “I could not convince my clients to agree to your reasoning, I tried my best to rationalize to my sellers why they should continue to make concessions in your buyer’s favor but I could not because I do not see any logic in your requests.  Unless you can think of a way to explain how asking them to give your clients even more creates a win/win situation… they are done.  My sellers want to consider other buyers if we cannot close now with no further concessions.  The only other thing we can do is for you to advise me how to tell my sellers what you are asking for is fair.  You have been great so far in negotiating I am hoping you have thought of a way for it to make sense for my clients to give your clients more. I want sto close so you will need to advise me verbatim the fairness in your request. If not, help your clients to understand we are either closing as is or my clients are going to sell to other buyers.  That is why I am sorry…I wanted this to work for you and your buyers but only if everyone gets a fair deal out of it.

Change your approach, and you will have a chance at a different outcome.