Some feedback belongs in the fireplace…

Bad feedback is not the same as feedback that addresses your areas of opportunity. 

Knowing the difference could have a major impact on your career and your self-esteem.

If you cringe when you receive bad feedback from a client I hope this post makes you far less hard on yourself.

First, lets talk about what bad feedback looks like…

Bad feedback is when someone provides you with a review of something you supposedly did but their delivery is overly emotional, attacking and non-constructive. 

Feedback should have useful undertones as you absorb it.

Stay focused when you get feedback and look for what is actually useful about what was said.

Now, this doesn’t mean look for something positive the client said about how you did.

What I really mean is look for a suggestion that they made, look for a trend or pattern when you read feedback from clients.

If people start suggesting similar things that begins to be useful information.

However when feedback feels malicious and sounds like it goes on the attack beyond what could be interpreted professionally by your delivery, it is likely bad feedback.

That means that you should probably throw it away or ask that the individual make another attempt to provide their opinion with a more constructive approach.

Here is the problem with feedback…

To often we take personal offense to bad feedback and decide we should snap back, attempt to change the persons opinion of us, or worst of all…

We consider changing something about our performance to appease this hyper critical type of person in the future.

Unless your job is to pack a parachute properly which ensures they all open correctly at 9,000 feet…

You do not need a 100 percent satisfaction rating in your sphere of influence. 

If 95 percent of the people you work with are singing your praises then changing your method could risk far more people by changing something than not changing.

All feedback is not created equal. 

Use common sense.

It the best way to gauge if you need to change something about what you do.

Here is a terribly extreme example (but it works to make the point):

If your client feedback (99 out of 100 times) constantly and constructively suggests that you speak louder when you are talking to them, this is a good sign you should make a change by speaking up.

That is constructive feedback because it identifies your area of opportunity and suggests what you could do going forward that would help remedy the issue.

Good feedback is proactive, professional, useful, and unemotional.

That is totally different than: One person out of 100 telling you to whisper because they can not stand your voice, so you decide to speak even softer…

Now becoming basically inaudible to the 99 people that indicated they could not hear you well already.

It will always be a bad decision to change something major about your delivery to appease one person when your current delivery has a measurable positive impact on the other 99 percent.

The above example was obvious for when not to take feedback personally and make a drastic change but sometimes it will not feel as obvious.

Sometimes the topic of the feedback really strikes a never.

And that is at the heart of this topic.

To stay mindful that 100% satisfaction for most of us will NEVER happen, and that it is okay to be disliked by some of your clients.

When we change for the 1% opinion, our emotions have clouded our judgment.

Do not let the 1% have that kind of control.

Your boss may argue this point but, that 1% of dissatisfied and often tactless clients… do not matter.

The 99% of your clients who need you to keep being you, need you.

The 1% that reject you do not know you, what works, or what they are talking about.

They don’t care that they are the 1% minority opinion, they still think they are right and you wont be making the right decision to change for them.

So by all means look for the usefulness in every feedback you recieve.

Feedback truly can be a gift.

But for the feedback that is less valuable than the re-re-re gifted gift…

#StrikeAmatch to it, Start an nice fire in the fireplace on a cool evening with it, and get back to being irreplaceable.